Abba I welcome you onto this blog, may you be present in every word I speak and every word I write.
School begins. Everything i've known for the past two months has changed. I enter reality again, a place that's so far from being heaven on earth. Life has started up again, I feel like God has been preparing me all summer for this year. Although I have left a place that was so full of God and entered a place that is far from what God desires I know that He desires so much more for this place. I pray that hearts would be opened, chains would be broken that freedom would reign over this place like never before. May God dwell in this place, may He enter every room with eyes turning to Him every second. I pray that rawness and vulnerability wouldn't be something that is feared but something that is genuine. Abba, welcome in this place, I welcome Him. May He go before me and alongside me, may He comfort me and give me an awakening. Take me, break me, recreate me. I want to burn with unquenchable fire. I pray that churches would uproar with a fire, a passion that cannot be tamed. May the desire for God grow in this place. I pray freedom over this hill.
I thought going back to school would be different this time around, leaving camp was so hard, not because I was leaving friends or because I was leaving that sisterhood that cannot be found anywhere. But mostly because I know that here I have no one to run to but God, I'm fully dependant on Him. More than usual as well, I have no physical, no person I can go to for advice or guidance or prayer or just to sit and chat with. I mean I have friends but not to the complexity of those I met this summer and previously. Although I do know God is going to use me in ways I cannot even fathom, as He reveals it bit by bit I know that I must do it, I cannot fall short of that, I rejoice in that. Some days I just want to be with those people because I feel that I'm doing nothing and that I've fallen short but how can I? "If God is for us, than what could stand against?". Although I am not physically near these amazing people I often remember things that they say.
Most days of my summer there was this amazing Kiwi girl names Aliesha but I call her Zeal, or Liesh but mostly Liesh, She has meant so much to me this summer. She's a person that is so full of God that everything she does and says has Abba written all over it. She's taught me so much about everything [wisest 19 year old I know], she challenged me in new ways, she has this beautiful arrogance to make me laugh all the time [Its contagious]. The last couple weeks her and I would just sit in this hammock on the water for at least 45 minutes a day and just talk about life, people God. Sometimes she would just ask the most random questions that I would have never thought of in my life, and she gets me to expand on EVERYTHING. At night I would always sneak behind their chalet and scare her, I'm, pretty sure she almost peed once. She would alway say certain things to me that would encourage me, and she always knows exactly what to say. I remember she would always say " today's the day that you have made I will rejoice and be glad in it" and eventually we would just sing it all the time, except I always got it backwards and say "Today's the day that you have made I will be glad and rejoice in it". I guess it works either way. So now everytime I have a moment of sadness I just sing that to myself. Man do I love her and miss her soo much. How that friendship was one that was so from God, I praise Him for it always.
Another of my friends/mentor named Becca, well actually I think of her as more of a sister. Ahh, she is so dear to my heart. She has taught me soo much, and I thank God everytime I think of how she has helped me over the years. I can think of countless times that she has helped and encouraged me, and how special she is to me. But there is one thing that she has always said to me a city set upon a hill" and if you can visualize that image it's pretty amazing. [This is form the parable of Salt and light in Jesus' sermon on the mount.] In Matthew 5:14 He says "You are the light of the world. A city that is set upon a hill and cannot be hidden." To be honest I heard this for the first couple times not knowing what it really meant, well I knew where it was from and what the idea of it was but never what it meant to live in such a way as that. It was only a 2 years ago that I began to understand it more. And now I see it more and more. God truly calls us His anointed ones, He has placed us on this earth to bring His light into darkness to serve others to be disciples. to be raw and to be vulnerable. Nothing can hide that city. The image of the city on the hill never escapes my mind, since the day she said it that image has become something that I so desire more of. I desire for each person to be a part of the cities. I desire for God's kingdom to hit earth harder than ever before, I passionately desire this. I have been so blessed by this lovely woman of God, She walks freely, she dances joyfully, loves unconditionally and talks with authority [asking whatever she likes in God's name and He will provide]. " If we are constantly in God's presence than we begin to know the wishes of His heart, we become unified" I believe this to be completely true, I believe that in His presence what we ask for and what we do is all from Him. In those moments we are hitting the mark [our prayers are His desires]. I love her and praise God for everything she's taught me.
Sadly these two amazing people probably live the furthest away from me. :( So dear to my heart though.
One last thing...
Amen.
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